Saturday, June 30, 2007

Looks like Ductape Fatwa is really gone

At bare minimum, his email account no longer works, as I discovered this evening when I received an error message to the effect that the account had been "discontinued or disabled." I know at Yahoo that typically accounts get discontinued for any of a number of reasons including lack of activity (a few months of not checking your email, and "poof" the account is discontinued unless or until the account's owner reactivates it). Unless he reappears or unless a relative is sufficiently cognizant of his internet life to contact some of us with news (good or bad) about his circumstances, I can only hold on to the faint hope that he's still alive and well (or that he is at peace).

Anyone who ever read his blog, or checked any of his postings at the various "gated community blogs" (a term he coined just months before he disappeared) or some of the larger or smaller community and group blogs will know three things about him: 1) he had a uniquely creative writing style, 2) he was no stranger to controversy (just look at the testimonials to him at the far right column of his own blog, for example) and 3) he was good at unifying a diverse and probably divergent group of people. The latter quality in particular was readily apparent during the early weeks of Mo Betta Meta while he was still active, and has been sorely missed in his now extended absence there (the animosities that have sprung up subsequently between one-time friends have been nothing short of heartbreaking [at least so to me] to say the least).

I'll merely use this post as a sort of message in a bottle, in the hopes that one day someone who knows his whereabouts can get in touch with me or one of his other friends who miss him.

For now, I'll leave you with a poem he posted over at In Flight last September 11:

by Martin Espada

Alabanza. Praise the cook with a shaven head and a tattoo on his shoulder that said Oye, a blue-eyed Puerto Rican with people from Fajardo, the harbor of pirates centuries ago.
Praise the lighthouse in Fajardo, candle glimmering white to worship the dark saint of the sea.

Alabanza. Praise the cook's yellow Pirates cap worn in the name of Roberto Clemente, his plane that flamed into the ocean loaded with cans for Nicaragua, for all the mouths chewing the ash of earthquakes.

Alabanza. Praise the kitchen radio, dial clicked even before the dial on the oven, so that music and Spanish rose before bread. Praise the bread.

Alabanza. Praise Manhattan from a hundred and seven flights up, like Atlantis glimpsed through the windows of an ancient aquarium. Praise the great windows where immigrants from the kitchen could squint and almost see their world, hear the chant of nations: Ecuador, México, Republica Dominicana, Haiti, Yemen, Ghana, Bangladesh.

Alabanza. Praise the kitchen in the morning, where the gas burned blue on every stove and exhaust fans fired their diminutive propellers, hands cracked eggs with quick thumbs or sliced open cartons to build an altar of cans.

Alabanza. Praise the busboy's music, the chime-chime of his dishes and silverware in the tub.
Alabanza. Praise the dish-dog, the dishwasher who worked that morning because another dishwasher could not stop coughing, or because he needed overtime to pile the sacks of rice and beans for a family floating away on some Caribbean island plagued by frogs.
Alabanza. Praise the waitress who heard the radio in the kitchen and sang to herself about a man gone.

Alabanza. After the thunder wilder than thunder, after the shudder deep in the glass of the great windows, after the radio stopped singing like a tree full of terrified frogs, after night burst the dam of day and flooded the kitchen, for a time the stoves glowed in darkness like the lighthouse in Fajardo, like a cook's soul. Soul I say, even if the dead cannot tell us about the bristles of God's beard because God has no face, soul I say, to name the smoke-beings flung in constellations across the night sky of this city and cities to come.

Alabanza. I say, even if God has no face.

Alabanza. When the war began, from Manhattan and Kabul two constellations of smoke rose and drifted to each other, mingling in icy air, and one said with an Afghan tongue:

Teach me to dance. We have no music here.

and the other said with a Spanish tongue:

I will teach you. Music is all we have.
Ductape, wherever you are, I hope there is music.

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